Jacob Rees-Moog : “A Retro Tory Trance Floor Groove”

Hit on Nanny to buy the “Nann Widdecombe Dominatrix Mix”

Status Quo : A fronte praecipitium a tergo lupi

Original “Handmaiden Mix”

Jacob Rees-Moog is an entirely new genre of music informed by fake nostalgia … An 18th Century Tory Synthpop Trance Floor Groove !!  Never before have such retro-futurist sonic meanderings been assembled for the delight of your ears and timepieces …

Mortem Parca affert, opes rursus ac facultates aufert 

Jacob Rees-Moog was inspired by the notion of facing the future by travelling back to the 18th Century – a world untrammelled by labour laws, environmental standards, women’s rights, secular religious views, contraception, and a rise in living standards.

Tantum nimirum ex publicis malis sentimus, quantum ad privatas res pertinet : nec in iis quicquam acrius quam pecuniae damnum stimulat

Jacob Rees-Moog or “JRM” as it is known on the Latin speaking dance floors of Ibiza, Chew Magna and Midsomer Norton is an entirely new genre of music : ECTSTF or “18th Century Tory Synthpop Trance Floor”. JRM “celebrates” a post Brexit world of gratuitous land pollution, the sublimation of women, flower border control, slavery, the return of the penny farthing and Stephenson’s Rocket as national transport, re-introduction of ricketts, typhus and plague as national diseases, Latin as the national language, nationalised jam making for the export drive, the use of the Cutty Sark as the Royal Yacht and the restoration of Britain’s role as a major warring nation.

Quo Vadis : BUYING LINKS – Click images to buy

If you want to pollute your fields, eat chlorinated chicken, burn lightbulbs of any wattage, put your children down the mines, insist that women who have been raped should have the children and so on then Jacob Rees-Moog is the groove for you. Recorded on 18th Century retro Korg and Moog synths and clockwork analogue Theramins. We can guarantee that excessive amounts of electricity were used and that women and children were neglected during the recording of the song …

Here’s another fine piece of satire from Westdal and Hayward:

Find Jacob on The Sunday Politics at 1 hour 00.38

Fortunae naufragium


Jacob Rees-Moog was produced in an experimental exponential synthesiser laboratory after eating excessive amounts of chlorinated chicken and gorging on English Mead and Port plundered from the colonies by slaves.  The piece features star of Channel 4 News, Madeleina Kay, some samples from the Moggster in “Full English Brexit” mode and an obligatory Siamese cat called Boris. The pussy was paid less than the minimum wage for the work and now scrounges from food banks, having been disowned by Jacob, due to being “foreign”.

Mors ultima ratio

Harry Potter must not return to Hogwarts

The Moog Versus the Mogg Synthesiser

From Confusion can come Chaos … the production process

“Can I pollute your fields?” – Voiceover star of JRM, Madeleina Kay, Artist, Author, Musician, Brexit Activist


The known “inputs” to JRM were George Clinton, Brian Eno, Moby, David Bowie, Level 42, Prince,  and Bill Nelson but undoubtedly there are many more in a kind of 18th Century spaghetti western set in North East Somerset, where the streets have no name and synthesisers are outlawed.

The Credits

Julian Mock Tudor Smurf Turd : Synthesiser programming, sonic manipulation, coffee, cats

Peter Rees-Moog : Guitar, samples, interference, Oblique strategy cards

Madeleina Kay : Mogg Temptation, TV appearances

Jase Bell – Chapman Stick Bass, Border Control, P-Funk

Mark Duffy : Videography, animation @Mark_Duffy1

Thank you to Alison for this image – ever so slightly rude

Pro-Bono : Since you’re here …

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Rage Against The Brexit Machine ℗ & © Peter Cook 2019

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